Crossroads

7 Jun

I stepped onto the scene 39 years ago on June 7, 1971 (yup today’s my birthday) in a small city by the name of Canton, Ohio.  True NFL groupies know it well.  I must have checked my Facebook page at least 10x today as I basked in the well wishes bestowed upon me by friends gained through the years.  The outpour made me feel thought of and loved.  An ex-boyfriend even had the “nerve” to personally deliver me flowers and an ancient piece of Louis Vuitton luggage that I tried talking him out of over 7 years ago.  I collect old luggage and he figured since the worthless thing was sitting in his basement suffering from water damage, mildew and collecting dust he would finally rid himself of it.  His trash, my treasure.  We’ve become the friends that we were never able to be when we were dating.  It’s funny how things turn out.

I am sitting at home alone preparing a champagne toast for myself as I contemplate the fork in the road that I face.  You see, I have officially reached mid-life crisis mode.  I’ve worked in the corporate world for so long and I must admit that I was caught up in the hype of the politics for quite some time.  For a while I thought that as long as I could gain a promotion here and there, $10K here $20K there + bonuses and continue climbing the ladder, I would be A-Ok.  However, my respect and patience for it all started to unravel about 5 years ago…

I wanted to be happily married with children by now and have riches unforetold.  Of course we all know that life has it’s own share of twists and turns and that our plans are usually not the same as Gods.  Thus far, my path has included many things, just not the husband, children, or unforetold riches!  Now I really can’t complain because I definitely have my share of God given happiness.  It’s just that you know when we’re dealing with the Great I Am, we all have a tendency to say “but God what about…” even though we need to be happy within the here and now.

I graduated with a degree in Fashion Design and I started out on that career path, my passion, but all of these years later I have deviated from it.  I must say, I have picked up some crazy efficient skills from corporate America that are invaluable.  But when my love for the corporate world begin to unravel in my heart and mind, I realized more than ever that I missed my passion and that I needed to go back.  I would voice my thoughts to select people and would get compelling feedback and confirmations from them.  One of them told me that “If you put the effort into your own business that you put into this job, you would have been a millionaire already.”  I took that to heart.

It still took me a few years, but in the in between I realized that it was time to leave corporate America, go for my passion.  My mother laughed at me when I told her a couple of months ago that I had finally matured to the point where passion was first and money was second.  You see, the universe usually shows you that when you are happy pursuing passion, the money most certainly follows very closely behind.  I’m banking on that because I know me, and what I am capable of.

I still want that husband and those kids though, along with that well paying passion.  However, in light of time, one may not really make time for the other so at 39 years of age I am at a crossroads.  I may have to leave one of those desires behind.

This is the basis of my life right now.  I have created this blog on my 39th birthday to keep you AND ME posted.

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5 Responses to “Crossroads”

  1. Shaton June 7, 2010 at 10:13 pm #

    Choose the family!! There’s nothing more exciting & nerve wrecking yet so wonderfully fulfilling that I know of…hell 39 ain’t isht anyway!! You can still have it ALL…or maybe just a little of both! (-;

    Take Care! & again, Happy Birthday!!

  2. Shahada Ismail June 7, 2010 at 10:26 pm #

    I love you cuz, and thanks for sharing, and I know you, whenever you put your mind to something, MashaALLAH (In Appreciation to GOD), It’s yours for the taking!!! Congrats on your decision, and hold on, cause GOD is not through with you yet, “May GOD’s many Blessings rain down on you cuz!” Love ya!!! Shahada aka Erica

  3. Chef Melissa D, Ricketts June 16, 2010 at 9:30 pm #

    Dear Patricia,

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts and passions for life in this blog. As you know, I am also in the transitioning stage of my life at 33 years old from the corporate arena to building a successful business. It is inspiring to know that we are not alone in the transition. Riches are great, however the reward to enjoy life and focus on your passion is more humbling.

    Congratulations and Continued Success!!
    Melissa 🙂

  4. Sean Patterson July 29, 2010 at 8:12 am #

    I feel you on the corporate world thing. I too was progressing in the direction that I thought I wanted to go career wise. I hit a snag a few years ago and realized that the career path I was headed was not really the path I wanted to go. I am currently doing WORK that I enjoy but I am no longer sure about my CAREER. Keep working at it. I know I will.

    • Patricia A. Jackson August 8, 2010 at 11:03 pm #

      Sean, thanks for commenting on my blog. It’s great to hear feedback from you. I have a new post, check it out when you have a chance. Thanks for the well wishes, same to you.

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